Doubts

I was doing some research today for one of my internships, and I came across something that blew my mind. In the middle of reading about a very talented and accomplished writer named Donald Murray, I realized that EVERYONE doubts themselves at one point or another. And sometimes people that seem incredibly brilliant or beautiful or gifted from the outside really feel insignificant or incapable on the inside.

Just to give you an idea of who Donald Murray was, I'll list some of his accomplishments.

• He won a Pulitzer Prize at age 29
• He received an honorary doctorate from the University of New Hampshire, where he also established the school's journalism program
• He wrote for the Boston Globe for 20 years
• He published more than 10 books about the writing process, as well as fiction and poetry

Clearly, the man had talent. He knew how to write, and he was good at teaching others to write. But in his last column for the Boston Globe before his death, Murray wrote these words: "Every time I sit down to write I don't know if I can do it. The flow of writing is always a surprise and a challenge. Click the computer on and I am 17 again, wanting to write and not knowing if I can."

When I read this in my research, I could hardly believe that someone so gifted could have the same doubts that run through my mind. I constantly lack confidence when I go to pick up a pen or type up a story.

My sister-in-law, Jenna, was visiting recently, and she and I talked about a similar subject. We talked about how we often compare ourselves to others. We sometimes assume that certain people have huge levels of confidence in their appearance or in their abilities. But the truth is, almost every person has doubts. We all feel insecure at times, and we all have to summon the courage to be ourselves and to follow our dreams.

I think one of the only ways I can find to conquer the inevitable doubts and insecurities is to recognize that only one opinion really matters: God's.

Donald Murray may have experienced the same doubts and feelings of insignificance that I often face, or he may just have been a very humble human being. Either way, I think there's a good lesson.